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life is too short

I got a text from my mom last night, that said that one of her long time friends had passed away.  We all knew that this day was coming, but when it actually happened it just took me by complete surprise and shock (Que the big ugly cry).  I had literally been thinking, the day before, about sending her a card because I wanted to let her know that we were thinking about her and now... it's too late.

My mom's friend had been diagnosed with cancer just shortly before my mom was re-diagnosed with cancer for the second time just months (or barely a year) ago.  She had invasive procedures done to deplete the cancer and were successful, only to have it return months later.  This time, it was much worse and it was spreading to places that they weren't going to be able to cure without ruining her quality of life.

She sent my mom an email about 2 weeks ago, saying goodbye and telling those on the email that this would be the last communication from her because it was her time to go.

And then Sunday, she passed away.

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My best friend's mom has been battling cancer since we were in high school.  It's nasty.  It's relentless and it just plan sucks.  With every phone call that I have with my friend, the news doesn't get any better, it just makes me fear the worse.

My friend's mom is very positive.  She has always been this way and while she knows she's fighting the fight of a lifetime, she does it with every ounce of strength and power that she has. Her diagnosis and prognosis, as of lately, have not been great and it's really heartbreaking.

My friend has a 16 month old and in order for their family to be together more than what they had been able to, her mom & dad actually just moved minutes from my friend and her brother so that they could spend more quality family time together.  My friend's mom said that if this is the life she's granted, then she's going to spend every second she has living it and being around the people she loves the most.

She's coined the phrase, "life is too short!" and she's living this phrase to it's fullest.

I don't know what her outcome will be and neither does anyone else, but while she's here, she's planning on doing anything and everything that she can while she can, because there's just no time to waste.

And yes, this means eating dinner at the dining room table every day.

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Cancer surrounds us all, in some form or fashion.  Sometimes it's a lot closer to us that we would ever like, but  we have to take it as it's given and work through it.  For my mom, she just never gave up.  She always had the mindset that she was going to beat this and that this cancer wasn't going to bring her down.  Now, she did have down moments and she did have negative moments... but overall, she was positive.  She knew she was going to pull through.

While I've never been a cancer patient, I'd have to believe that this is how I'd want to be, too.  Positive and just knowing in my mind that there was a way out and I was going to get there.

Yes, life is too short, but if you don't have the mindset of being positive, it can really hurt those around you and yourself, more than you think.  And with or without cancer in your life, you should strive to live this way, as much as possible.

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For me, in my life... I know that my time with Coen, as a baby and going through all of his milestones... RIGHT NOW, is going to feel like such a short adventure.  When I am with him, I want to spend every waking moment of his, with him.  I don't want to waste it on chores or anything else.  I just want to spend my time watching him and loving on him.  Sure, those things (chores) will get done but I'm not going to make them the top priority when Coen is with me.

Life is far too short to worry about chores when a life (of any age) is developing right in front of your eyes.

Comments

Stephanie said…
You are so right. My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer at 41 so I'm at a high risk too. I can't imagine leaving this world so soon, and it breaks my heart to think I may not be there for all of Chloe's milestones. But a positive attitude has SOO much to do with a cancer diagnosis I think. My mom had a great outlook. I don't know how she did it, but if anything positive can be taken away from such a diagnosis, I think it's to live each day to it's fullest and not take anything for granted. I'm sorry you've been surrounded by such loss lately.
Erin said…
Jill, I am so sorry to hear about your friend passing. Cancer is no easy thing to deal with or even to have surrounding you in life. Sounds to me like you have a strong bunch of women around you. The message of this post is quite powerful and so true. Thanks for the reminder to soak it all in.

On an unrelated note, I wanted to be sure you knew I've changed domains. Our blog has moved from Confessions of a Magnolia Mom to The View From 510! I hope you'll add our new domain to your feed and continue to follow along :) www.theviewfromfiveten.com
Trish said…
Oh Jill...sorry to hear this. Cancer sucks. And I FULLY understand what you mean about making your "life" your priority because I try to live that too most days. There is something about being pregnant and having kids that actually makes your mind wander to that place about eternity and the what if's...a bit of dread over this really awesome thing. Dying is just scary but it sucks mostly, for those of us left behind, feeling the wait, longing, and missing and aching, to be reunited. Heaven is real my friend. Trust in that when your mind wanders elsewhere.

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