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co-sleeping

Sleep is something we all need.

Coen needs sleep.

I need sleep.

And dad needs sleep.

When one of isn't sleeping (especially Coen), it's hard for all of us to sleep.

Some nights are really good.

Some nights are really bad.

Really bad meaning, he gets up before I've hit my deep sleep and we both can't find sleep again, until I go up and pick him up.

Monday (last week), Coen slept almost 11 hours in his own bed.  This was a complete and shocking blessing because I hadn't had a good nights sleep since before he was ill.  Every night since then, he's had a few hiccups.  I don't know why and fortunately, it's not because he's ill.  I'd like to chuck it up to getting more teeth in, but I cannot tell for sure if that's what's going on or if there is something else.  I can feel teeth moving in his gums, but I don't know if that's the only thing hurting him or if there is something else.

Either way, sleep is really choppy and it makes it hard for all of us to get a good night's rest.

Our house philosophy is that we will try the cry it out phase for a minute, but if that goes on too long and the cry gets louder, we just don't fit it.  Reasons? Well, a. It keeps everyone up when we have to listen to the crying, b. crying it out sucks, and c. if one of us sleeps with him or holds him while he finds sleep again, he's going to be back to sleep so much faster than fighting the cries.

Co-sleeping wasn't something that I was really "planning" on doing from the get go, but our goal was to do whatever worked and to just follow his lead.  In doing that, co-sleeping has become part of how we get Coen to sleep sometimes.  This isn't night-time specific.  It's anytime it's necessary. 

My husband experienced this when he was on spring break.  He said that he would put Coen in his bed for nap-time, he'd go down fairly fine (without crying or much whining), he'd sleep for about an hour or more and then he'd have this outburst that wouldn't stop.  He'd go up and pick him up and he could tell that he was still tired, so they would cuddle on the couch until they both found a comfy spot.  Sometimes Coen would end up laying over S's waist, but it was comfy and it worked.  It was as if he just needed the human contact and warmth to feel secure and safe to sleep again.

It's strange how baby's brains work, but again, we're going to do whatever works for them.

Yes, I'm aware that I'm pregnant and by co-sleeping with Coen still, might cause a problem when baby #2 arrives, but we're okay with this.  We're just going to have to adapt to the arrival of our new life and just adjust.  At that point, sleep (for anyone - adults especially) will be completely out the window anyway, so I guess it won't matter if the whole house is sleeping or not.  It will just be different and we're prepared to just roll with whatever we're given.

Coen knows how to sleep through the night and starts off in his bed, every night, but with the combination of colds and other milestones, he's been interrupted lately and while I do look forward to the days when sleep is more consistent, I'm okay with how it's working out now.  There's nothing specific that I can change to make it better, so we are just rolling with it.  I just hope that good sleeps happens again soon. We're ready, whenever he's ready.

Comments

Allison said…
You are so right--you have to do what you have to do and what feels right to you. E hasn't ever been a great sleeper, but we were never comfortable with letting her cry it out for longer than a couple of minutes and that was our choice, for better or worse :)
Erin said…
Oh goodness. It's never good when the babes go through a tough sleeping phase. And although I'm no a co-sleeper, I am a mama who likes to stay sane. So I I say do whatever gets the little ones to sleep! Hope you all get some good rest soon!
Stephanie said…
Co-sleeping was something I didn't plan on either, but Chloe actually made us implement it. I think JJ would have liked her sleeping with us on a few occasions, but that child would get so restless and would NOT sleep in our bed. OK then! Back to her crib she went. But I agree with you, do whatever works best for your family - that is my motto on almost everything related to parenthood these days. :)
J o s e y said…
This is definitely how cosleeping has ended up for us...here and there, it happens. I don't mind the cuddles anyway. :)
Mrs. Dirnberger said…
You do whatever works for your family...do whatever allows sleep! One day you will fiqure out the best, but as infants you can't read them so nobody knows whats best!!!! I feel for you b/c my first teethed hard and was ill alot, so we were on the cough for months and thats what worked! There will a time when you can reason with coen, but for now DO Whatever WORKS for YOU!!
Trish said…
We all of our babies, we kept them in our room, sleeping about 12" from my face, but in their own bed/portacrib/bassinet for about 7-9 months. Then, we put them in their rooms. And when they would wake, we would rock them in their room, until they settled. And if they cried, we would let them cry a few minutes and start all over. For whatever reason, growth spurts, over stimulation, etc interrupts kids sleep...and will so periodically for a LONG time. Heck, seems we go a good stretch of about 2-3 months and then hit a rough patch for a week and then we are back on track again. Just go with the flow, do what works best. I love the Baby Whisperer book. I found it really helpful when I had TWO babies crying in the night at once...yeah, that was fun. Good luck love.

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