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worry wort...

so we are on cycle 16 and we are just playing the waiting game right now (2ww). i did have another progesterone test done and everything looked good. meaning i ovulated when i was supposed to ovulate but the test doesn't give any indication of whether or not i'm actually pregnant. that part of it makes me start to worry. so i called this morning just to make sure that i was right about the information. so technically i could be pregnant right now but she said to wait out until the 35 day and then start testing... wwwahhhh? 35th day? are you serious? do you know who you are talking to? i mean seriously. i'm surprised i haven't purchased a test already. i'm always an early tester and i haven't really done it any other way. i don't think that i mentally can! i get so anxious that if i don't i begin to go a little nuts. i know that it only adds stress and that is what potentially makes your cycles fall behind but i can't help it.

i am also a little worried. my husband is going to have a semen analysis done and sent to the lab on monday. with all of my tests at a stand still for now, it just makes me a little nervous to wait for his test. i know that it could just been something simple but the unknown is a little nerve racking. at one point i would love to know the reason why were aren't able to conceive on our own and on the other hand i just don't want to know. i know for those of you who haven't experienced this, it might seem weird but when you have no control over a situation that seems so easy for most and it's your own body... it's really frustrating!

it will get better right? there will be times that i won't worry as much, right? i won't always be nuts about this and someday it will just become second nature, right? or will it get worse? will i always stress out over this? maybe it's just timing? maybe i'm pregnant right now? i guess we'll just have to cross, well cross everything... fingers, arms, legs, hair, eyes, hands, feet and everything else... and hope for the best!

coming from an hsg about two weeks ago, maybe we are luckier than we thought... =)


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